


Board games and the recondite thoughts of a doctor

by CNS



Category: The Avengers (2012), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Bruce Banner Feels, Bruce acing said board games, Bruce being terrible at W.E.L.D.E.R., Bruce playing board games, Darcy being caring, Darcy knowing about Transformers, Protective Hulk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-19
Updated: 2013-05-19
Packaged: 2017-12-12 07:45:11
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,239
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/809058
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CNS/pseuds/CNS
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bruce is friends with Jarvis and Dummy, and sorta friends with the rest of the Avengers, but it isn't until Darcy Lewis comes into his lab to escape the science! of Jane's lab that he has someone approaching a best friend. Someone who approaches and rapidly surpasses best friend, in his mind.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Board games and the recondite thoughts of a doctor

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, I love Bruce and Darcy stuff. Bruce cannot be paired with anyone else in my mind, and the same goes for Darcy. They're just... God. They are the first OTP I've had where I just cannot get into any other pairing with either of them. But anyway, I was reading a really awesome Avengers story but a bit was gory and holy crap I actually started feeling nauseous while reading it, so this is the equivalent of comfort food. Comfort writing; it's totally a thing. But yeah. I'd say this was my first attempt at writing something with them, but it's really not. This is like attempt number five, and attempt number four is still being added to because... stuff. So yeah. Enough rambliness now, I think.

Since things had calmed down in New York, Bruce had had a dreadful amount of time to think. It was worse than anything because no matter how immersed he was in science, the thoughts of other things would dance around his head and the other guy would roar up at certain topics and force him to drop things to do yoga stretches and breathing exercises. He'd do Egoscue, but the instructor's voice irritated the other guy, so it was best not to. So he thought about things; his life as a kid and teenager and how horrible it was and full of fear and anger and the ever present question of why, about meeting Betty and spending time with her, about his research and how quickly he'd been rising, about General Ross... Only one of those topics didn't make the other guy surge forward with a secondary emotion that Bruce was afraid to identify, because if he identified it then the other guy would somehow be an integrated part of the Bruce Banner whole, rather than a separate entity he could blame his crumbled past on. Sometimes he went into the containment room that Tony had put into his lab, hidden until Jarvis opened it. Sometimes he needed to ask Jarvis to stop monitoring him in the evenings, and he trusted Jarvis a hell of a lot more than Tony in these matters due to the fact there was no data anywhere in Jarvis's humongous servers regarding any of these incidents. When Jarvis stopped monitoring him, he'd let emotion overwhelm him and he would cry. He'd cry and cry out all the hurt, his inner child still keeping up a broken litany of _why? why? why?_ as he curled up. He'd shake and his father's many words would tear through his mind, followed by or mingling with everything he'd ever heard Thaddeus Ross say about him. And then everything would go green and he'd feel safe and disconnected, the other guy blocking all the grief and somehow cradling him with his presence as he smashed at the unbreakable walls. Bruce always, always shoved such memories of safety in green away, unable to handle them or the question of why the other guy would stay silent except for grunting and growling while punching the walls and ramming into them. Eventually, Bruce would lose any sort of conscious thought, and go into a state similar to dreaming as the other guy exercised his freedom.  
Whenever he woke, he'd look like nothing had happened, and Dummy would be poking into the room with clothes held in his claw for Bruce while Jarvis asked if he would like breakfast delivered to the lab. Really, it's almost sad that Tony's robot and AI are in some ways better friends than he is. The reverse is also true, undoubtedly, but these two were always there without fail when he woke up. He also has a sneaking suspicion that Dummy purposefully shoots Tony with the fire extinguisher whenever they're experimenting together and Tony starts asking something too personal or too dirty. He feels grateful for it, despite the two malevolent voices in his head telling him he's not worth it and that he's pathetic for being so happy to have artificial beings doing things to help him. And then Dummy is suddenly rolling around his lab waving his arm one day while Bruce is trying to calculate, which is followed by Jarvis announcing a visitor. His only visitors are Tony, Dummy, Clint, and occasionally Pepper. Jarvis only doesn't count as a visitor because he's technically there all the time. "Come in, I guess?" he called, pulling his glasses off and tucking them into his shirt pocket so as to try and curtail the urge to fidget. He's already thinking up reasons for why he'd have a visitor when someone he'd never seen before walked in. "Hey there!" she called, waving, and Bruce gave a bemused wave in return.  
"Hi?"  
"You're Bruce Banner, right?"  
"Yes?"  
"You know, I'm not going to say 'good, because I'm here to kill you'." Holding out her hand, she smiled and pushed her glasses up on her nose. "I'm Darcy Lewis, Doctor Jane Foster's lab assistant. We're working in the next lab over and she's going all horrifically sciencey. I've been told your lab is way better for people who know next to nothing about astrophysics, so I hope you don't mind if I hole up here." Shaking her hand, Bruce frowned a little.  
"If you don't know about astrophysics... If you don't mind my asking, why are you her lab assistant?"  
"Because I was the only applicant and there was a total jerk at school who was making life difficult in the most not-fun way imaginable. Even my taser wasn't enough to deter him." Bruce's eyebrows rose at that.  
"You have a taser?"  
"Yep," she said, grinning and reclaiming her hand. "I used it on Thor, but Jane did one better." She looked at him expectantly, and he lowered one eyebrow a little.  
"What did she do?" he asked, recognizing a cue when he saw one.  
"She hit him with the truck, twice. The Humvee is a proud veteran. The nerdy engineers on floor fifty should totally try and make Autobots, and then make one of the Humvee being 'the Thor vanquisher', named something like Lightningrod."  
"Lightning rod. Right."  
"So yeah, it's cool with you if I hang out here, right?"  
"I don't know-"  
"Come on, I'll totally bring you coffee and food! In other words, I'll do for you what I do for Jane. Give or take filing, depending on whether or not you already have a system."  
"I drink tea." Before he could be embarrassed, Darcy waved a flippant hand.  
"No worries. I'll simply bring you Night Watchman's tea or something. Lemon honey ginseng your thing? Blueberry? Gingerbread? Vanilla and chocolate and cinnamon?"  
"Mint would be fine."  
"Excellent! Thanks Doc Ban-Ban!"  
"Ms. Lewis, you do know-"  
"Darcy."  
"You do know about... Um... The other guy, right?" Up the two voices in his head rose, talking about unworthiness and being used, and then the other guy's voice roared over them and told Bruce to pay attention. Darcy looked amused.  
"You back from space land so I can respond to your query?"  
"Um... yeah." He flashed a sheepish half smile at her, and watched as she smiled back. That was unusual. Almost like- no. No think of kittens in barrels or otters in bibs or something. Or pencil case stories.  
"Yes, I do know you're the Incredible Hulk."  
"I wouldn't call the other guy incredible."  
"Shush you," she said, grinning and waving a hand at him. "Shush or I'll make you take a time out. So I know about the Hulk, I have watched footage, and I have come to the conclusion he needs TLC just as much as you."  
"... What?"  
"Obviously he's dangerous. Anyone with half a brain could tell. You saw the footage from the battle, right?"  
"Um... Yes...?"  
"Ah good. Then you obviously know that the Hulk worked with the team and saved Iron Man."  
"He punched Thor-"  
"He did? Oh awesome! Thanks for that!"  
"What?"  
"He totally pulled a jerk move and didn't leave a message or anything for Jane at the very least. You know they're kinda a couple, right?"  
"Uh... No, I did not know that."  
"Apparently he thinks she's a virtuous warrior maiden and mage." Darcy snorted, smirking. "You should have seen her blush. But yeah, he's totally breaking her heart and she's thrown herself deeper into research, which ain't cool, so he totally deserves another tasing."  
"Maybe...?"  
"I'd totally hug the Hulk for punching Thor," continued Darcy conversationally. Putting his glasses back on so he could read, Bruce frowned.  
"No. If the other guy is around, you run."  
"Yeah, except no."  
"No? Ms. Lewis-"  
"Call me Darcy. Christ, Ms. Lewis is my Great Aunt who looks like she's sucking on a lemon all the time."  
"Darcy, you have to run away from the other guy if you ever see him."  
"No, 'cause that would be stupid."  
"How is that stupid?" he asked, frowning at her instead of paying attention to the screen in front of him. She smiled from where she was lounging on the couch.  
"Have you ever noticed how some predators only chase when you run? If they start moving in your direction, then yes, run. Otherwise? You wait for signs. Also, the human eye tracks movement better than it tracks stillness."  
"Does it now?" asked Bruce, only to give himself a chance to think, rather than out of not knowing.  
"Yep." Darcy smiled again, then waved a hand. "So continue with your marvellous land of science! instead of trying to give me the 'stay away from me I could hurt you' speech. I'll just play Dots over here, and make sure you and Jane consume something in two hours."

\---

Darcy Lewis seemed to have some sort of intuition when it came to scientists. If they needed quiet, it was quiet. If they needed chatter to keep them in a state of slight distraction so they weren't thinking of problems directly, she had endless pop culture and history knowledge to ramble on about. She also had a very extensive taste in music. Which is why Bruce entered his lab a few days after their initial meeting to catch the tail end of _Sabotage_ by Beastie Boys before _I Am Not A Robot_ by Marina and the Diamonds started. Not that he knew the names of the songs or the bands until Darcy actually told him later. "Hey Doc!" she called, waving from where she was perched on his filing cabinets, legs crossed as she used a StarkTablet she had not had the day before. "Stark technology is freaking amazing. Why didn't I own any before?"  
"I don't know, Ms. L- Darcy. Why didn't you?"  
"'Cause it totally wasn't in my starving college student budget," replied Darcy, sounding sage. That made Bruce feel mildly uncomfortable, because someone like Darcy shouldn't have been struggling to make a life for herself to the extent she could be given that label. "But anyway, it's pretty damn brilliant, and Jarvis totally has all my playlists done in one go. Jarvis and I are totally best buds now, by the way."  
"Are you now?" asked Bruce, sounding amused.  
"Indeed, Dr. Banner. Might I commend you on wearing a straight shirt today, sir?"  
"Thanks, Jarvis."  
"You're welcome, sir."  
"You know, I kinda like the rumpled scientist look on you better," said Darcy, tapping her lower lip with a stylus, not paying attention to the fact this got red lipstick on it.  
"Oh? Why's that?" asked Bruce, sitting at one of his desks and typing, the soothing click of the keyboard painting his thoughts in muted greens... Not that he noticed.  
"It looks sexy on you." Poor Bruce had just started sipping from the thermos on his desk when she made that comment, and he choked. Something suspiciously like laughter sounded in the back of his mind, but it wasn't malevolent as Bruce choked and inhaled deeply.  
"Um..."  
"Geez, man, it's like you've never been complimented before, which I know to be as untrue as anyone saying Chris Traeger never says literally."  
"Chris who?"  
"Oh god, you don't watch Parks and Rec?"  
"Um..."  
"What about The Office?"  
"No?"  
"Duck Dynasty?"  
"Dynasty?"  
"Ugh!" Darcy threw her hands up in the air. "Doc, me and you on Saturday night in Tony's fancy pants living room on floor one hundred. Seriously, man, how can you live without those shows? They're like, the best thing ever! Candy for both your ears, eyes, and brain! You will never be the same once you hear Phil-osophies, you will never again think of Hawaii Five-o without also picturing someone leaping sideways into a bush, you will never hear the word 'false' again without thinking up facts!"  
"I take it you watch a great deal of all these shows...?"  
"At least tell me you've seen Gargoyles!" continued Darcy, as if he hadn't spoken. "Everybody who's worth anything has either seen Gargoyles or would be willing to watch it! That stuff's got Shakespeare, and I ain't no fan of Shakespeare, or the third season of the show, but come on! MacBeth rocks everybody's socks!"  
"I thought it was pronounced 'McBeth'?"  
"They pronounced it as MacBeth in the show, you ain't got no room to judge!" she said, but she was smiling. "Walking through New York will never be the same once you watch it. You know how hard I laughed when I realized I was on Broadway?"

\---

Bruce knew that Darcy had met Tony. He also knew that she thought Tony was funny, but she preferred his company over the billionaire's. This was a first, and Bruce had been slowly coming to think of Darcy as _his_ friend, and Jane and Erik's, but mainly his. So of course Tony decided that after a week and a half, she had to meet everyone (excepting Thor for obvious reasons). During the five minutes of introductions, Bruce had to employ more breathing exercises than he'd had to employ in the past three weeks. She met Natasha first, eyebrows raised and arms crossed. Then she proclaimed her cool. Clint was declared cool straight off the bat for wielding a bow and arrows. Bruce felt a stab of jealousy when Clint preened at that and Darcy started laughing and saying they'd totally be bros forever if Clint agreed to give her archery lessons (which he did). Captain America though... Bruce left the room using the excuse that he needed to grab something from the lab that he'd wanted Clint and Natasha to pass on to Fury regarding the progress for the cure (which was still none). It was a valid excuse, but he had purposefully left it behind when Jarvis had gently suggested that Bruce might want a reason to get away from the introductions for a short while. He thanked the AI in the elevator, because seeing Darcy clap her hands and go into what she'd referred to before as fangirl mode (Jane had met him, which was why Darcy had even told him in the first place)... It was painful. Now that she knew the others, what interest would she have in quiet, 'zen master', tea drinking Dr. Bruce Banner? What could he possibly offer that would capture her attention? Science was not a big interest of hers. She was more into TV shows and popular movies, and into her wide range of music and social media networks. Dummy met him on the lab floor, and rolled along beside him with small whirring noises to the lab, then he poked at Bruce's arm. "What?"  
"If you will pardon our audacity, Dr. Banner, the Dummy unit and I would like to suggest a method of spending more time with Ms. Lewis."  
"And that would be?" asked Bruce, not even bothering to deny that he liked spending time with her, no matter how dangerous it was and how selfish of him to take up someone's important time like that when he was so clearly unimportant...  
"Take her up on her offers to show you her favourite TV shows, but also tell her of the ones you enjoy. Dummy suggested you offer to play 'Syllables' with her."  
"Syllables?"

\---

"Xenowhat? You totally made that word up!"  
"No I didn't," said Bruce, looking amusedly over his glasses at her. "Xenoglossophobia is the fear of foreign languages."  
"Well sheep dip," grumbled Darcy. "And my best word was astrophysicist." Darcy glares at her score card for a moment before looking at Bruce. "How many points did you get for xenowhoosits?"  
"I got four hundred forty points for xenoglossophobic," said Bruce, smiling now as Darcy cursed again.  
"I only got three hundred fifty for astrophysicist. Jane, you've failed me," she called over as an afterthought, rolling her eyes when Jane didn't respond. "Sometimes I really wonder how I manage to be friends with Jane," she said, shaking her head in mock sadness. "Roll, Doc Ban-Ban." He did.  
"Antidisestablishmentarianism."  
"What the f-?! You cheating cheat!" laughed Darcy.  
"What, did you want me to use supercalifragilisticexpialidocious instead?" he asked, smiling.

\---

Darcy giggled into her hand as Bruce cursed, brow furrowed as he shifted tiles. "Who knew you'd be brilliant at Syllables and absolute shit at W.E.L.D.E.R?" remarked Tony, leaning over Bruce's shoulder before drawing some tiles around and spelling 'goddess'. "Yes, I'm a genius, Bruce, and you may now go cry and drink mineral water." Bruce rolled his eyes, his mouth quirked into a smile.  
"I think I'd rather drink mineral water and watch Darcy play Jet Set Radio." Darcy gave a mock gasp.  
"Bruce! You said you wouldn't tell anyone until I beat Benten-Cho in chapter one!"  
"You agreed not to mimic Yo-Yo until you'd completed chapter two," replied Bruce.  
"Oh come on Bruce, you'd totally be cramping my style if you stopped my impersonations of Yo-Yo!"  
"Those were impersonations?" asked Jane, absently glancing over. "It sounded like someone dying." Tony had no problems laughing himself sick over this, but Bruce tried to reign in his laughter as Darcy choked and spluttered. His hand rose without any conscious decision on his part and started rubbing her back until she recovered. She didn't think it odd, and Jane wasn't paying attention, but Tony suddenly had an intense 'I am plotting' gaze directed at them. Bruce's hand dropped.  
"Bruce, we should totally make a profile for you and you should play! You'd be an awesome Tab to my Mew!" It was Tony who choked this time.

\---

Bruce was used to spending time in the containment room. It had happened less since Darcy made her way into his life, but it still happened. Instead of just going on about how worthless he was, his father and General Ross's voices included comments about Darcy. They hurt and made him miserable, but they made both him and the other guy _angry_ as well. Darcy wasn't an object, Darcy was never an object. Darcy _not object. Darcy Avengers'!_ Except that's not what he thought, was it? He thought of her as his. He was a horrible, horrible person and a hypocrite. He and the other guy agreed Darcy wasn't an object (because it was safe to agree with the other guy in here), and yet here he was referring to her as 'his'. Did that not mean he viewed her as something to own? _Darcy Banner's! Darcy like Bann-_ While Bruce had no control of the other guy at times like this, he could still see, because the other guy was letting him see. And what he saw made his heart feel like it was stopping. _Darcy here...?_ The other guy approached her, ignoring all of Bruce's frantic pleas for him to roar so that Dummy would pull Darcy out and Jarvis would close the door and lock it tightly. His ignoring him had a studious air to it. What a lot of people, okay everyone, didn't know about the other guy was that when Bruce was in the driver's seat, so to speak, the other guy had access to Bruce's extensive vocabulary. The reverse was also true, meaning that while Bruce would be able to look back on these memories and impose 'normal' speech patterns on his thoughts, at the time he thought them they were in what might as well be cavemonics. "Bruce? Are you alright?" Darcy asked, which halted the other guy.  
"Not Banner," he grunted, even though Bruce was _right there and oh god please don't hurt Darcy-_ "Hulk."  
"Sorry, I just... You look like Bruce." She shrugged. "Though you are a _lot_ taller, that's for sure. And kinda scary, but I'm good at facing my fears, especially when they look tolerant of me." She tilted her head before grinning.  
"What funny?" asked the other guy, eyes narrowing as Bruce hyperventilated in the back of his head.  
"Nothing, nothing. Your skin just happens to be my favourite shade of green. Hey, if Bruce ever had a kid, you could call them a little floret!" Both of them were baffled by that one, and apparently it showed. "You're kind of reminding me of broccoli, big guy."  
"Hulk not vegetable."  
"That's true, but vegetables rock and we couldn't live without 'em. So back to the original topic... Are you and Bruce alright?"  
"Hulk fine," grumbled the giant, then he looked past her. "Close door."  
"Okay. Hey Jarvis, mind closing the door for me?"  
"Ms. Lewis-"  
"I'll be fine."  
"Very well, Ms. Lewis."  
"Thanks Jarvis!" While this interaction happened, Bruce was having a fully fledged panic attack, which was irritating the other guy. "What did you want to tell me, Hulk?" Huffing, the other guy sat heavily in a corner of the room. Darcy made the both of them tense when she walked right over and sat on his big green stretched-denim covered thigh. She waited patiently, a hand running soothingly over his forearm. They could both feel her hand shaking a little, and they could smell her fear, but she was calm despite it and was looking up with only concern in her eyes. "Banner hurt," the other guy finally admitted, ignoring Bruce's groan.  
"How is he hurt?"  
"Head," said the other guy, frowning. "Father and Ross talk in Banner's head. Say bad things, hurt Banner, make Banner feel bad. Feel not important." Bruce knew he was sounding hysterical now as he begged the other guy to stop telling Darcy these things, hysterical and angry and afraid, but the other guy simply shoved at him and threatened him with the dream-like state until he stopped. And Darcy stayed, seeming to know to wait before responding.  
"Hulk... What do you think of Bruce?"  
"Banner stupid in normal things. Banner hurt all the time, Banner puny and broken."  
"And what do you think of yourself?"  
"Hulk protect Banner." Bruce forced himself into the dream state, but not before he heard Darcy saying that Bruce was a wonderful man and that she was grateful that he was her friend.

\---

Bruce could practically feel Jarvis's displeasure as a palpable thing when he started avoiding Darcy. Dummy whined in pitiful protest when Bruce asked for help avoiding her, but the robot gave in in the end. What Bruce had not expected was Clint to get in through the vent, drop a letter on his desk, and then vanish back into the vent. Bruce read the letter, and then he shut his eyes and let himself cry silently outside of containment.

\---

Darcy was on the roof when Bruce found her. "Did you really mean all that?" She raised an eyebrow at him. "About... About how you feel about me and... Am I really indispensable to your happiness?"  
"Doc, do you think I'd have gone to all the effort to write that letter to you if I didn't mean it?" She turned to face him. "Bruce, I've had some bad relationships. Boo hoo, big sob. But that doesn't mean I'm going to look at you through Hulk's glasses, see you as someone broken, and balk at the idea of helping you recover and find the strength to believe in yourself." She idly threw a piece of gravel off the roof, looking out across the city. "You know, it took me years to find myself."  
"Why?" asked Bruce, approaching slowly until he stood next to her.  
"Because when I was growing up, my sister had all the attention. I was supposed to be quiet and smile. My parents love me, I know, but I missed out on the parental affection filled childhood. I only got anything like the attention I wanted when my sister turned fifteen and asked if I could go live with my aunt because she hated me." Bruce inhaled sharply, but Darcy wasn't done. "It snapped them out of whatever it was they were in, because they told her that if she disliked me so much, she could move away. So she did. But they didn't know me as much as they knew her. They didn't know about me wanting to be an Autobot who secretly sympathized with Decepticons. They didn't know about the stray puppy I adopted that got run over by a semi coming through town. They didn't even know what my favourite colour was, except that it wasn't pink. But you know what, Bruce? All the crap and bullshy was worth it."  
"How could any of that be worth it?" asked Bruce.  
"Because if it hadn't happened, I wouldn't know you. I don't know if you think the grief you went through was worth it, but I do, even if I don't think it was right."  
"Why?"  
"Because at the end of it all?" Darcy turned her head to look at him. "You're a strong man who cares about people, which is more than most of the boys I went to school with could ever say."

\---

They went out on their first date a week later, and ignored the money being passed around as a result of the bets that had been placed on them. Hearing Tony complain about Jarvis taking their side and sabotaging any tech meant to track them or record them, and about Dummy using the fire extinguisher on anyone Tony asked to tail them, was worth it.

**Author's Note:**

> Hahahahaha oh my gosh, my first completed Darcy and Bruce anything. Oh gosh I think I might cry for joy. This is totally unedited, but I'm pleased with it anyway. I put references to a bunch of different things. Otters in bibs and kittens in barrels, as well as pencil case stories, is from The Mighty Boosh (that oughta please my sister). Bullshy is from Matt Barry's post about his album 'Kill the Wolf'. I forget any other references.
> 
> But yes, take my pitiful offering to this pairing which has become (for serious) my one true pairing in this fandom.


End file.
